bag blog

Last night we helped celebrate Lee Hinde’s 0×32nd birthday at the home of Julie and John Steele. John had previously requested some of us to prepare remarks for the appropriate moment. In a fit of ego, I volunteered. Here are my two contributions.

Apologies to Mr. Joyce Kilmer

I think that I shall never be

As witty as my friend Lee

His cultural proficiency

Outshines mine, it’s plain to see

His eclectic iTunes ‘list

I only sometimes get the gist

And references to TV shows

I try to fake it, but I think he knows

But he’s always quick to share

and alleviate my dumbstruck stare

the meaning of the subtle twist

or strange allusion that I missed

For that’s his nature, that’s his way

He’s Lee — I like him that way!

Apologies to Dr. Seuss

One Fish, Two Fish

Red Fish, Democrat

White Fish, Green Fish

Where did I leave my phone at?

Black fin, Bluefin

Where has all the sushi been?

White sock, Red sock

Yellow sock, Birkenstock!

Grey beard, big grin

Maybe there’s a double chin!

Some are thin, some are fat

The fat one wears a fedora hat

This one has a hybrid car

He’ll take you there, if it’s not far.

But remember there is a fee:

Gas, grass, or Peet’s

No one rides for free!

Oh, the thoughts we share

driving through the fog

I know he’ll write them

in his blog

Here is one who ought to run

I wish he would, he’d find it fun

I do not like wingnuts and spam, he says

I do not like them

Lee, I am

Tonight I’m making cookies for the sales staff where I work. Here’s the story.

One time, near the end of a fiscal quarter, the CEO issued an e-mail that read something like this:

We’re getting near the end of the quarter, and it’s looking good. Let’s all pull together and encourage our fine sales staff to reach for the stars and exceed their goal! If there’s anything you can do to help them, do it!

I thought to myself, “Cookies! I’ll make them cookies!” So I did. I followed the recipe I’ve used for a long time, and I made a quadruple batch! I brought the cookies into the office the next day, and I carefully set two on the desk of each sales person. In their common area I put a big bowl of the cookies with a sign above that read:

Cookies are for closers!

This was my reference to A-B-C: A-Always, B-Be, C-Closing from David Mamet’s play Glengarry Glen Ross. In the play there is a famous line: “Put that coffee down!! Coffee’s for closers only!” I was trying to be funny, especially since that same CEO had recently given each of us a set of little wood blocks that stuck together with magnets — A, B, C. (On my set I wrote “Always Be Coding” — but that’s another story.)

The cookies were a great success! The sales staff loved them! They gobbled the two I gave them “for free,” and each time they closed another sale they got another cookie from the bowl!

About a week before the end of the next quarter, they started asking me: where’s the cookies? One sales staffer in particular used to ask me nearly every day if I was going to bring cookies again. And thus, the tradition was born. I don’t do it every time, but many times I make cookies for them at the end of the fiscal quarter. This quarter, they’re getting some.

Introducing Karen’s new weblog: KarenGreen.com.

Yes, I know she’ll be writing about me. It’s a price I’m willing to pay to get her to write. She’s good at it, and I hope her weblog gives her a voice to say whatever is on her curly mind. Someday, I know she’ll use it to run for office or something.

(Special thanks go to Trevor Marshall and his talented daughter Karen Marshall for selling the domain name for a very reasonable price.)

Tonight we went to Ugly’s Tequila Bar in Citrus Heights to hear my Non-Genetic Cousin Sam Baeder perform.

His stage name is Sam the Scientist. He does vocals and lead guitar, and lately he’s been playing with a drummer and bass guitarist he calls the Champions.

Sam’s music has the loud speedy echo of its Orange County garage band roots. He tells stories with his songs, and his lyrical style is narrative and kooky — it lies somewhere between early Bob Dylan, Frank Zappa, Beck, and urban performance poetry. After a few songs I was reminded of Almost Cut my Hair by Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young.

The group played in two sets, and I took a few photos. Before we left I was sure to pick up Sam’s album Death by Pipette, a bargain at $5.

Today I turn 0×28, or 40 in regular decimal.

Read the rest of this entry »

Just now we’re listening to the Christmas Eve performance of this year’s Nine Lessons and Carols. Our local Public Radio station is broadcasting it live from King’s College in Cambridge. It’s just lovely, and reminds me why this kind of performance is my favorite.

Technorati Tags: Christmas, King’s College, music

Karen has been making and decorating Christmas cookies all month, and over the very rainy weekend I had fun helping her. She’s been making three kinds: Spritz cookies, Sugar cookies, and Gingerbread cookies.

Technorati Tags: Christmas, Cookies, National Lampoon, Christmas Vacation

Read the rest of this entry »

My colleague Lee Hinde sent me this very nice iCard on the second day of a recent spate of sick days. Lee and I have a nice tradition in which we acknowledge each other in a pseudo-jock Cheers-style recognition of exaggerated name-saying each day. I think we both missed it.

Thanks, Lee! You’re the best!

Technorati Tags: Hinde, Lee, Cheers, puppy

Tonight I saw a beautiful sight: a flock of ducks flying south in the bright night of a nearly-full moon high in the sky. I could hear them cheering each other on as they wobbled in their graceful way, changing places in excitement. They rode the evening wind far above the trees while Mars added its brightest jasper-shine to help them. He was visiting the moon, only two fingers away, and had a slow twinkle brighter than any star.

I have noticed that one of the main components to the inertia of making (or not making) a web log entry is the choice of a proper category. Thus, I am eliminating them: no more categories. Or, at least one main category and that’s all. Tagging, now, will be my main method of distinguishing entries one from another.